Dear Tamar,

I am a widow, 83 years old, slender, active, attractive and independent.  I am sad because I lost the love of my life and fear I will never find anyone else who is open to pursuing the art of love and living as much as I do. I am uncomfortable telling my age, except to my doctor and other confidants, because I believe there is such a stigma attached to this number.  Any advice?

Dear 83 Years Young,

I couldn’t help but laugh out loud when I read your email. My Grandmother, who is 81, tells people she is 36, not because she expects them to believe her (although she does look amazing), but because to her age is a state of mind and saying she’s 36 keeps her feeling young and healthy. At the same time though, once my Grandmother had her 80th birthday she began telling people her real age because she was proud of it and knew she looked darn good! So I see it both ways. Since you’re looking for people around your same age to spend the rest of your life with, “pursuing the art of love and living,” I don’t think JDate is the place to be lying about your age. Embrace it and you will attract men who are also active and independent. Make sure your age range preference shows what ages you’d be realistically interested in meeting and do your homework as well — use the search function to find men around your age who have similar interests. Good Luck!