Last night “Mike,” one of my dearest guy friends, came over to catch up.  As Mike shared his dating adventures, the discussion evolved to the lack of dating etiquette that he had recently witnessed. There is no argument that relationships have layers of complexity, but the reality is–the basics are as simple as Robert Fulgrum told us in All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten (When you go out in the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together). Self awareness, observation, consideration, and respect for others is HUGE. I think everyone has their own ideas of what proper dating etiquette “is.” The “Door Test” from A Bronx Tale, is a classic example. After listening to Mike, my few takeaways are:
*Ladies, your date has put effort into planning a nice evening (perhaps even planned based on a unique observation/conversation between the two of you), thus a simple thank you the next day expressing acknowledgment for a well planned evening goes a long way and is greatly appreciated according to Dr. Mike (especially in the beginning).
On the flip side,
*Gentleman, waiting a week to follow up is never cool and does not ever work to your advantage. The whole playing hard to get is so 1990’s. If you had a good time, why wouldn’t you express that and arrange another date? If that is not a possibility, at a minimum reach out and express your desires and that you will follow up afterwards. More communication is always better. Although I begrudgingly accept the Tech Generation and the ease of texting/emailing, there are tremendous benefits of hearing someone’s voice and making an old fashioned phone call.
To be continued…