Good relationship habits are not formed overnight. Many of us have poor relationship habits that we learned either by watching our parents or from bad early relationships in our younger years. It may sound funny, but a little “relationship training” is needed by just about, oh, everyone. If you’re single and dating without any luck, or dating after a divorce, it’s a great time to take a good look at your dating and relationship behaviors. Do you need to be cleansed of some bad and dirty habits?
Same Partner, Different Face
This is one dirty habit that many of us need to quit.
We tend to meet the same type of person and experience the same types of relationship challenges, which leads to similar repeated heartaches. For example, the ladies who love the bad guys, or the men who date unavailable women.
Are you dating the same person, but with a different face?
If the answer is yes, ask yourself what it is that attracts you to these people. Maybe it’s time to date someone who’s not your “type.” Date a new partner, new face – it’s the best way to get new results.
When you look at your relationships, which role have you played: the chased or the chaser?
If you find yourself in a set pattern, it might be time to consider a change of paths. The reality is that when two people have great chemistry, there won’t be a whole lot of “game” involved, but there does tend to always be one person who initiates and the other who responds in return.
It may be that by being the chaser, you are scaring away people too quickly, or not letting the right people approach you. If you are the one being chased, you could be coming off as standoffish, or perhaps missing out on pursuing others because you’re busy waiting for them to make the move. Try changing it up with the next person you date.
Do you find that you’re not sharing how you feel until it is too late? Or are you the type that doesn’t say how you feel until suddenly, you’re angry texting or yelling?
Take inventory of your communication style. Is it too much? Are you pouring your heart out before the person even knows your last name? Or are you too restrictive, often hearing from people that you’re too distant or cold? Are you passive-aggressive, never sharing what you want but expecting others to guess how you’re feeling?
You may need to change how often you communicate, what channels you use to communicate and how you’re sending your messages.
Last but not least, in your relationships, what sort of sexual issues have risen up from the remains of your failed relationships, if anything?
Take note of issues you have had sexually with partners such as, frequency of sex, types of sexual behaviors or how soon (or late) you develop intimate relationships upon dating.
It may be that you have a lot of sexual hang-ups and lack confidence, or perhaps you are a selfish lover. You might also be diving into a sexual relationship before you’re really ready. Work out these issues before you start up another serious relationship.
As you start a new year, use these tips to get a fresh start in your love life. What bad love habits will you break in 2017?
You may also be interested in 5 Tips For Letting Your Guard Down In A New Relationship
Your use of the term “passive-aggressive” is entirely wrong. The term refers to non-verbal and non-physical aggressive behavior that manifests itself in negative ways. For example, the passive-aggressive individual might appear in agreement, polite, friendly, down-to-earth, kind and well-meaning while, underneath, there is manipulation going on that effects the other person in negative ways.