There are a lot of things one has reason to fear in Los Scandalous: earthquakes, gang violence, the dreaded encounter with a former flame. The city is always immense except when you want to avoid someone, and then it’s unavoidably quaint. So what do you do when the dreaded close encounter finally takes place? Better yet, what do you do when he’s sporting his latest and greatest accessory – bad dye job apparently included. Take comfort in the fact that you a) survived, and b) that your hair doesn’t look as fried as something that should be served on a Denny’s late-night menu. So when the once wanted rendezvous takes a turn for the worse, smile through denial and always remember that no amount of bad-bottle-blonde dye jobs will make her what you were. Egocentric? Maybe slightly. But still dating Darwinism at its finest. Survival of the hottest isn’t a theory here in this city that never sleeps – it’s a rule. Travel in packs and look fierce, so when the bad fried-and-died mess has the pleasure of meeting you, you have the privilege of getting through it with grace.