How to Find Love in 2014_Header

We’d all like to meet someone organically, and we would all love to be swept off our feet! In our busy world, however, that doesn’t always happen.  In the movies, finding love seems so easy, but it often takes effort to find people with similarities on a number of levels – someone you find attractive and whose values mesh with yours.  It takes work.  The best workers make a plan, stay organized, and hold themselves accountable.  So, here’s how you can make a dating action plan to keep moving forward with your love life goals:

1. Be clear about what you want.  If you want a certain type of partner, think about where he/she would hang out, or what key words they would include in their JDate profile.

2. Make a comprehensive list of dating actions. For example, asking a friend if they know anyone who could be match, or asking someone else out on a date.

3. Choose up to two dating actions you will take per week. For example, you can commit to writing five people on JDate two times a week, and then see if they respond to set up a date.

4. Mark those times or events on your calendar to remind you to follow through.

5. If you go to a singles event, consider asking a friend to accompany you as well.

6. No excuses – be accountable, even if it’s cold out, or you aren’t in the mood.

7. Praise yourself for your commitment, regardless of the outcome.

8. Think about any lessons received, even if you didn’t yet meet ‘The One.’

9. Ascertain whether that location (if it was an event) is worth a return visit.

10. Keep the faith and do two new things next week!

Dr. Paulette Kouffman Sherman is a psychologist and the author of “Dating from the Inside Out” and “When Mars Women Date.” She also works as a love coach and runs groups on dating and relationship issues in Manhattan. Learn more at: and
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