Dear Gems from Jen,

I’m new to online dating after being divorced for three years. I thought now that I’m 38 years old and the men I’m meeting are in their forties, things would be more clear cut. Unfortunately, they are not. It seems like if a guy pursues me and shows great interest he’s interested.  As soon as I show some interest back, they pull away. HELP!

Dear Dating Again,

I do understand your frustration! This seems to be an age-old complaint. If we as women show interest and take on the role of pursuer, the men tend to run and hide. Not every guy does this, but enough do it that it is a common complaint. My suggestion would be to not come on too strongly. When people feel pressured or pushed, many tend to pull away. The results we are looking for don’t usually come to fruition. Take things slowly. Show interest without pushing. Take the getting to know process one day at a time. Don’t put all of your hopes and dreams on one person while in the beginning phases of the dating process. Spend time dating and just enjoying the experience.

Gems from Jen