Every so often you’ll meet someone who is willing to change their lives for you.

This past weekend a girlfriend of mine married the love of her life — a man who converted to Judaism to marry her. A few weeks ago another friend married the love of his life — a woman who uprooted her life to move cities to be with him. Sometimes these selfless acts are seen as the ultimate show of true love (as these cases seem to be), and sometimes these sacrifices can be seen as desperate (“you’re willing to give up your religion or your life to be with me?”).

You do want someone who is willing to walk to the ends of the earth for you, but only if you are willing to do the same for them. One-sided sacrifices don’t work. You never want someone to be able to hold something like that over your head. Make sure whatever it is they are doing for you is thoroughly thought out.

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