Dear Tamar,
I am getting frustrated (probably overstated) with the lack of views on my profile and I frankly (can’t believe I’m writing these words) am not confident in my profile. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I’m a successful, funny, good guy and shouldn’t (IMHO) be struggling. It wasn’t this hard in my twenties, LOL.
—Jason
Hi Jason,
Taking a quick look at your profile, I can see a few pretty major things to tweak that I think will help you get more of a response.
Profile Name
Since you don’t explain it or allude to it in any of your answers, it is a bit of an odd choice. You pride yourself on your sense of humor, so this would be a great place to catch the attention of other like-minded singles who would appreciate a tongue-in-cheek profile name.
Photos
You provide 4 photos that show your look is consistent, albeit 3 of the photos are quite similar. The 3rd one, in the striped shirt, is the best and should be your main profile photo. The last one with the 2 boys needs a description (You don’t have kids, so who are they? Your nephews?). The other 2 could be stronger and, seeing as they are all taken from your computer’s camera (which is basically a selfie and not recommended), I suggest trading them out as soon as you get other, more interesting, photos taken.
Intro
Your intro is really great! This is where your sense of humor truly shines through – rather than just saying you’re funny, you also show it through these couple of sentences. I don’t see a need to change anything here.
Answers
I honestly like everything you’ve written and how you’ve gotten across your personality. The one addition I would make is to use your sense of humor to poke fun at yourself, namely, your height and your cueball-shaped head as well. No offense, it is what it is. I feel like you’re the type of guy to embrace these things, so address them and embrace them and women will too. Using that third photo I suggested you make your profile photo, you can make reference to being an Evan Handler look-alike. He’s the actor who played lawyer Harry Goldenblatt on “Sex and the City” and also poked fun at his short stature and bald head before anyone else could.
Finally, I suggest adding in a bit more about who and what you are looking for in a relationship. Focus on the positive, rather than what you don’t want. And under the “My Ideal Match” column, you mention wanting a woman who only identifies as “single” but at 46 years old, I think it would behoove you to consider women who are divorced as well. In that same note, make sure your age range is realistic – 35-48 is a good place for you to start.
Contact Tamar to give your profile a much-needed makeover.
What a wonderful service! I commend your outreach & support.
Problem: I am an “older woman” with a young attitude & younger appearance. But, I am suddenly limping due to back/hip issues that I am working with. (4x week at gym). I love to travel etc. but the age issue is a problem. I have separated from my relationship of 33 years from a man 17 years my junior. Men my age are not attractive to me & seem like my own grandfather. My grandparents & mom lived to be over 102 yrs. old, so I thought I could have another chapter in my life. BUT, I need help.
What can your site do for seniors? My mom remarried when she was 75 so I know it can be done IF, there was a way to meet…….
Elf-no-more
Men have a realistic age range for women? I have to wonder why some men think a woman who is more than 15 yrs younger than them, is really interested in them or them and not for what they have. The 15 yr age difference doesn’t matter when you are 25/40.
But trust me, I have a 30 yr old friend who was involved with a 50 yr old man for 9 yrs…the older he got the more his age was starting to show. I am truly amazed at how many men I see in their late 50s who think they DESERVE a 45 or younger woman.