You just got out of a relationship, and you’re out on the town with your besties. While you’re out, you happen to meet a really cool, good-looking guy. You guys proceed to chat almost the entire night, and then he gets your number and calls you up a few days later asking you on a date. You go, you have fun, then you go on another date … and another date. Is he your rebound?
What Is A Rebound?
A rebound is when you go from one relationship to the next right away to avoid having to deal with the heartbreak of the previous relationship. Is a rebound bad? It depends.
Personally, I’m not a fan of the rebound. I’d rather take the time I need to get over the previous relationship and then, once I’m in a good place, start dating again. If you’re not fully over the person you were just with and then the rebound doesn’t work out, you’ll be in a worse place than you were to start. I think it’s really important to take that necessary time for yourself in between.
While taking plenty of time between relationships worked for me, it doesn’t have to be that way for everyone. If you’re going to jump into a rebound situation, that’s totally okay – but be careful. Even though your rebound could turn into something more, do not have those expectations when going into it. That way, if it does turn into something more, it’ll be a pleasant surprise. Be honest with yourself, though, because it’s very possible it’ll just be what it is: a rebound.
In addition, make sure your rebound knows he’s a rebound. While you don’t have to say, “Hi I’m Jessica, you’re my rebound,” you should make sure they know you just got out of a relationship. I’m not telling you to go into a whole song and dance about your ex and the relationship, but I think it’s only fair this new person knows what he may or may not be getting himself into.
It Can Be Fun!
The truth is that rebounds can be fun. They can also be a great distraction, which is sometimes just what the doctor ordered. And if you’re in a good mental state where you’re just looking for fun, then go for it. I’ve been there. Many of us have. Just be careful, stay in control of your feelings and keep those emotions in check. For example, it’s not cute to be kissing this new guy for the first time and you suddenly start hysterically crying because you’re thinking of your ex.
Ultimately, you’re in the driver’s seat. If you want time to get over your ex, take all the time you need. If you’re ready right away to make that jump into something new, by all means, go for it. Just continue to be honest with yourself and realistic about the situation you’re in. So, go make that lay up and follow it up with a slam dunk. We are talking about basketball here, aren’t we?
You may also be interested in 5 Tips For Getting Over A Breakup Jewish-Style