How much is too much time on the phone before that first hookup? How little is too little?

Too much can run the risk of forming a connection that will inevitably compete with the connection or lack thereof once you lay eyes on each other. A line I once wrote for George in a Seinfeld first draft: “Blind guys have it made. They don’t need looks! All they need is a cute voice. There are tons of women with cute voices!” Love may be blind, but on the road leading there, men and women are both visual creatures.

Being very auditory, I’m drawn to a certain type of voice. The wrong one is a deal breaker right away. The right one, I start filling in the other pieces to the puzzle, probably based on subconscious combos of other interesting women I’ve met across the years with similar voices. A recipe for ultimate disappointment if there ever was one! Before you get to filling in those other pieces… hang up the phone and meet them.

On the flip side, a woman recently avoided giving me her phone number beforehand. The voice inside me said, “This isn’t right.” I wound up basing our “chemistry” on our emails and her eternally smiling picture. How can real life measure up to that? It can’t. Lesson: Listen to the voice inside you. And before meeting her… hers.

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