Men don’t walk around with a sign on their head that says, “Date me.” It would be nice if they were that obvious, but they aren’t. They aren’t mind readers or psychics. Can you imagine how easy dating would be if they were? But, if they care about you, they try to show you with cute little gestures. If you’re wondering if your relationship is real, follow these 5 rules and you should know!

1.  Dinner Time

Does your man plan exciting dinners? You know, like a real dinner date? If he puts in the effort to look nice and takes you to a romantic restaurant, you’re in luck. He wants to date you!

2. Let’s Cuddle

After you’ve been intimate, does your man cuddle with you or just go to sleep? Cuddling is a sign that he cares about you. It’s his subtle way of letting his guard down and being vulnerable. If he just passes out, it’s time to get the hint that things aren’t ever going to be serious.

3.  Hey Parents

Has your man mentioned meeting his family? Meeting the parentals is a big step. It means your man has feelings for you and wants his parents to get to know you. Anything involving the parents is a step in the right direction. So if your man invites you to spend time with his family, get excited, because you’re in this for the long run.

4.  Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue

Women love flowers. They smell pretty and radiate happiness. If your man is giving you flowers, he’s into you. A man only gives a woman flowers if he really likes her. So, if you’ve received a beautiful bouquet at your home or office, your relationship is real.

5.  Surprise, Honey!

When a man likes a woman, he wants to see her smile. He does anything possible to brighten her day. If your man has been surprising you with sweet little gestures, he’s trying to show you that he’s crushing on you.

As women we make our own destiny. We’re too important to waste our time with men that don’t care about us. If your man isn’t doing any of these things, it’s time to realize he isn’t the one for you. Just remember, there are plenty of fish in the sea!

Carly Spindel is a writer and hopeless romantic. Carly is a world traveler who has lived in Paris and London. She resides in New York and is currently looking for Mr. Right. You can learn more about her at
  1. Some of this is misleading….

    1.Dinner Time

    ” If he puts in the effort to look nice and takes you to a romantic restaurant, you’re in luck. He wants to date you!”

    We’re in 2010. Men will open doors, take you to the movies, and yes get dressed and take you to a nice restaurant for dinner. Should that not be your default standard?! If not stop giving advice immediately. These nice gestures do not mean he wants to date you. Talk about putting the cart in front of the horse. A nice date means just that a nice date. Don’t get me wrong I’ll be completely smitten with Mr.Wonderful , but by NO means does it make sense to think he’s ready to date me. Observe everything else that follows the date. If he wants to date you let him make that clear. Don’t fill your head up with delusional thoughts before you get a second call.

    2.Let’s Cuddle
    “Cuddling is a sign that he cares about you. It’s his subtle way of letting his guard down and being vulnerable.”

    Cuddling, does not equate to a man caring about you. Men are human beings they enjoy being touched in an intimate way also. IT ISN’T ALWAYS ABOUT US!I’d say cuddling means there is interest but does not mean care.

  2. I disagree with just about everything in this article.

    1. Hey, this is 2010! We both work. A man doesn’t have to take me out! We go out together. If you go Dutch (except for special occasions), there is no power play. Believe me, my male friends tell me they are disappointed and sometimes angry after shelling out big bucks and they don’t wind up in bed at the end. And if the food is bad you can say so without his feelings getting hurt.

    2. A man only gives a woman flowers if he really likes her? C’mon! I can’t tell you how many times a man has shown up on a blind date and given me a bouquet. And he hasn’t even met me yet! And “All woman love flowers.” My, what a generalization! Some men love flowers. Some women hate flowers. Everyone has their likes and dislikes.

    3. Lots of guys are natural cuddlers. Doesn’t mean a thing.

    4. Being introduced to his family is sometimes a way of getting his parents off his back who bug him about not having a girlfriend. Doesn’t always mean he is serious.

    5. Surprising me with sweet little gestures? Again, this is not every guy’s way of showing that he cares. Some people are predictable and still loveable.

    Just my 2 cents!

  3. good stuff, Carly! But now I know some of the secrets to your heart, which is what I would love to capture (but never control–not my style).
    I know this borders on contextually inappropriate, but I had to put myself out there for you, even if it means I am to be crushed like a grape at the Fall harvest in Tuscany, or trampled by the bulls of Pamplona!
    Wish me luck! Or tell me I’m a schmuck if you must… Two questions, if I may be so forward with you: what is your color code, and how far would you go if you thought that I might be the one you’ve been seeking? I’ll grow wings to fly to New York for just an hour’s dinner with you. The courtesy of your reply would be most welcome!

  4. I agree with the topics written above. I also thinsomething should be researched and written about this that happens to me so often. I think its me and has to do with me . I have been so concerned and worried about this i asked many reputable gf’s. mostly i get that it isnt me and its where the man is in life. I am lucky enough to date quality men almost always. I am attractive and bright . I am a good mother and i have a greatcareer.
    The problem is I get so excited as the men that like me i think do all the above on your list and sometimes more when they meet me within a couple months. I get whined / dined. When we get to intimacy i get cuddles. i get flowers. I get the men making me laugh and caring about my happiness. Then something happens.
    I think (at least in my age range where men are single dads and work a lot); that they are afraid in actuality to take it to serious. Even though they all say that is what they want and that i am quality so they want it with me. Something happens after 3-4 months and they get scared. I have some that even call me back months later to try agian and they do that same thing. So it isnt me maybe???

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