Dear Tamar,

So what is the best way to meet a woman online? I am not a pick-up line guy and typically meet people through personal conversations. I am texting this person I met on JDate and I hate the texting stuff, but it seems that’s how the world works these days. I was married 26 years and am going through a divorce so this is my first stint at this. Any advice?


Texting and dating don’t match. A couple should not begin texting until they have been on a few dates. Before then it is too impersonal and leaves too much to be misconstrued. Believe me, a woman wants to be wooed and a text is not romantic (they can be, they’re just not appropriate in the beginning). After matching up on JDate, send a few emails, ask for her phone number, call her within 48 hours of receiving the digits and ask her out on a date during the first phone call and make the plans within 3-7 days after that phone call. You’ve been out of the dating game for a long time but for the most part things haven’t changed aside from the advances in technology. JDate is already something new and obviously useful, but the other electronic stuff can be ignored for awhile. If you receive a text, answer it succinctly but don’t open the door for a texting conversation. If it does start going back and forth, pick up the phone and call her and tell her that you’d rather hear her voice.

One Comment
  1. Thanks for the article and hope to read from you again. Tamar, What motivated you to call this blog “IH8TXTING”, not that the title does not go with the content, I am just wondering. Very valuable information Tamar.

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