You know New Year’s resolutions are officially in pre-bikini season full swing when you can’t find a parking space easily at your gym. Now, let’s be clear that there are two kinds of gyms: there’s the gym you frequent to get into shape, and there’s the gym you attend when you’re ready to parade around town with the body you’ve sweated countless hours to achieve. The latter isn’t filled with elliptical seeking sweeties, but rather beachy-keen bimbettes that wouldn’t need plane-supplied flotation devices in the event of a mid-Atlantic crash. These cardio-kittens aren’t there to workout, that’s what their other gym is for! Rather they (like the men) are there to show off what their mama’s gave them in all-American Apparel that leaves nothing to the imagination. Welcome to Los Scandalous two months before swimsuit season. A land where protein shakes serve as sweet treats and calorie counting is a league of its own. When visiting this wild exhibit in the urban jungle, remember to keep your hands and feet on your own elliptical at all times, unless specifically invited by a trained aerobic handler. And please, don’t feed the models.