One of the first arguments or questions that may float through your head after going on a few dates with someone you’ve met online is, when should both of us cancel our membership or stop checking the site? Is it okay to get mad at someone for logging on the site after you’ve been on three dates with each other and you’ve found yourself developing feelings? Should I feel like a bad person for going on the site to check my messages and search around, even though things are starting to move toward a potentially serious relationship?

  • Do: Have a conversation with that person. Before (or “after” in most cases) getting mad about finding out that the person you’re dating is still active on the site, talk to them to see where your relationship stands. Are both of you ready to be exclusive and take things more seriously? Or, are both of you okay with going on other dates with new people? This status type of conversation is not one that’s meant to put pressure or titles on anyone, it’s just to clear the air and keep the honesty flowing. It’s important to be on the same page as the person you’re seeing.
  • Don’t: Get mad and/or ignore the person you’re dating. They might not actually be seeing other people or keeping up with their profile. Instead of assuming, bring it up. If it’s too awkward of a conversation to have, or you’re too nervous, take a step back.

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