“JDate? Yeah, no one’s on that.” “I’ve tried it, but there’s no one on there.”
Have you ever heard someone say this before? I know I have. Heck, I’ve probably even said it before. But you know what? Unless you live in Antarctica, there ARE people on there. In fact, in preparation for this article, I searched in several different cities to find one with “literally no one on there,” and it was tough. Shout out to the JDaters in Anchorage, Alaska; Cheyenne, Wyoming; and Bozeman, Montana!
I admit that for folks in these kinds of cities, local dating may present some challenges. And as someone even in a mid-sized Midwestern city, I can attest that sometimes the options feel… limited. But, there usually aren’t zero options. It can be quite discouraging to scroll through the “same old faces” and not see anyone who interests you. I get it. And I totally understand why you might ignore the outdated profiles that have been cycling through your matches since the Bush administration. If you’ve used JDate for a little while, unfortunately it’s not hard for other “long termers” to become invisible! But I encourage you to take a second look. It’s possible that someone’s cover photo is unflattering, yet their essay reveals a more telling portrait of who he really is. Or maybe you exchanged a few messages with someone a couple years back, but now you’re curious if she still might be interested. Regardless of why you may have skipped over or subconsciously ignored certain profiles, remember – we are all on the same site presumably looking for the same thing. Give people a chance – there is no obligation to buy!
Conversely, if you haven’t updated your photos or essays in a long time, or if you’ve changed something about yourself, it’s time to update your profile. I know my eye goes straight to those little “updated” tags – it’s like a new and improved symbol. A couple times I’ve even wondered who a new cute guy is only to realize that he’s the same person I had previously overlooked – just with an updated photo.
Your online presence is like your house or car – it requires a little bit of regular maintenance to keep it working effectively. So unless you live in the Arctic Circle or a similarly populated place, it’s unlikely that there’s no one on JDate – just maybe no one who takes the time to regularly update and enhance their profile! So mark your calendars: change your oil every 3,000 miles and update your profile and/or photo to keep everything in good working order.