Very soon now, we’ll all be watching as the ball drops. Moments later, friend after friend will post “I’m going to be a new me!” all over their social media pages. But rather than creating a brand new you this year, maybe it’s time to consider what the old you is spending your time on. As a single person looking to find your beshert, one of the best ways to change your dating habits is by clearing out the “junk.” And by “junk,” I mean the people you’re chatting with and possibly seeing that are going nowhere.

Wasting Time: When Online Dating Falls Into A Rut

Think about it: what are the most common complaints among singles? Here are a few you’ve surely heard before:

“We keep randomly messaging online, but we’ve never made plans to meet up.”

“She’s just okay … nothing I’m really excited about.”

“He’s not perfect, but it’s better than being lonely, right?”

A lot of people seem to be wasting their time with Mr. Okay For Now or Ms. Likes To Text But Not Meet in Person. When you look at your dating life, do you find yourself chatting with a lot of people but making no real matches? Are you going on dates just to go on dates, yet not feeling excited about anyone? Are you messaging and messaging “matches” for weeks on end and wondering when you’ll finally meet? If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, ask yourself if this is a worthwhile way to spend your time.

How You Can Turn Things Around In 2016

In the New Year, resolve to spend your dating time wisely. So many of us fall into meaningless relationships because we hope they will turn into something else over time. But if this person were your beshert or true match, would it take this long for it to happen? If someone is invested in you, he or she makes the effort and doesn’t want to lose the opportunity to get to know you. The mindless texting and chatting with other singles is typically exactly that: mindless. Some people just feel bored or lonely, so while they’re waiting for the right one, they’re fulfilling their need through you. Do you want to be someone’s time-waster? I sure don’t!

What about those of us spending time with others in relationships that are simply not right? Is it a crime to not want to be alone? No, but while you’re filling your days with someone in the meantime, you’re missing out on someone for the long haul. They’re getting you no closer to the real love of your life. In today’s busy world, do you really need to waste your time on the wrong things and people?

This year, resolve to cut out old acquaintances that have turned into dead weight so you can open yourself up to the possibility of something really meaningful.

To 2016!

One Comment
  1. Laura,

    Very well said. I agree with what you wrote. Many people (women in my case) seem to like to hide behind the keyboards of their computer and just text back and forth. As if this is a game. I want to speak with a woman as soon as possible in order to hear the inflection in her voice.

    I am also sure many are in relationships that are not special and are going nowhere but due to the desire to be in a relationship are in one.

    All the best for 2016.


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