Dear Gems from Jen,

I am new to this. Literally just joined the other day. I’ve never done online dating before. I received some messages and some men I replied back to. Their instant reply was to send their phone numbers. I have never even chatted with them. Is this weird? I thought the whole purpose was to chat with someone first, before you do so on the phone or in public. What is online etiquette?

Dear Online Dating Etiquette,

I agree with you one hundred percent! The whole purpose of online dating is to get to know if someone might be a match for you before speaking/meeting. My suggestion would be to first chat with a potential match before calling or giving out your phone number. A profile can only demonstrate so much about a person’s character, traits, personality, etc.

My suggestion would be to ask these men to engage in some online chatting before speaking on the phone. Be sure to keep your personal information private until you are comfortable with the person you are interested in meeting. Always trust your intuition and do not reveal too much about your private life until you are ready and feel safe to do so.

The men who instantly gave their telephone numbers show their aggressive nature.  Not that this is necessarily a bad thing, but it sounds to me that you would rather have some online chatting before you speak on the telephone. Stay in your comfort zone and let things progress in a way that works best for you.

Gems from Jen