I’ve been there. You’ve been there. We’ve all dated someone who the family just isn’t a huge fan of. Maybe your family has reasons as to why they don’t like your boyfriend or girlfriend, like differences in personality or lifestyle. Maybe they’re just incredibly overprotective of you and believe that no one’s good enough for you.

Whatever the case may be, it’s not an ideal scenario, that’s for sure. Wouldn’t it be nice to have your family’s enthusiastic approval of your significant other? While it might seem like a long shot right now, here are  a few things you can do to try to remedy the situation.

1. Spell It Out

Sit down with your parents and explain why you like your bf/gf so much. And don’t just say “because he’s so nice.” Does he make you laugh when you’re feeling down? Is she a hard-worker with lots of drive and ambition? Give them examples of things he/she has done for you and describe his/her personality. Focus on the positive qualities your significant other has to offer and hopefully your family will see what you see in your SO.

2. Ask Them To Be Open-Minded

Tell your family how much it would mean to you if they gave him/her a chance (or if they’ve already met your significant other, a second chance). Let them know they don’t need to pretend to be best buddies with your partner, but you’d appreciate it if they could meet this special person with an open mind and heart. Ask them to try to see the best in this person who means so much to you.

3. Get Their Side Of The Story

Ask your parents, siblings or other family members why they don’t like this person so much. Maybe they have an actual reason that can possibly be worked on. Is it because your girlfriend seems to talk over you? Do they think your new bf is a workaholic? Your parents might not be getting the full picture, so get them to open up about their concerns in the hopes of talking through them together.

4. Bring It Up With Bae

Talk to your significant other and be honest with them. You don’t want them to feel awkward around your family, but you always want to be honest with the person you’re dating. Just explain how you’ve noticed that he/she and your parents don’t seem to click as much as you wish they would. Honesty is always the best policy.

5. Give Him/Her Some Hints

While talking to your bf/gf, give them the 4-1-1 on your family. Tell them what your dad’s hobbies are, what TV shows your sister loves, what kind of wine Mom likes, etc. Help them out. It’s not always the easiest or most comfortable situation, so your significant other will certainly appreciate some help on the matter.

In the end, it’s about you and your significant other, and if you’re genuinely happy and being treated the right way, then eventually your family will come around. Just give it time. If, after a while, your family doesn’t come around, you need to look at the pros and cons and see what’s most important to you. If your parent’s approval is of utmost importance to you, then you might want to reconsider things with your partner. But if you wholeheartedly believe this person is right for you, then keep on trying to show your family his or her best qualities.

You may also be interested in Crazy Jewish Mothers: Learning To Appreciate Our Helicopter Parents