Plans are stupid. If you’re making plans that extend beyond three years from right now, what are you doing? That’s not going to happen.

New Year’s resolutions typically fold by 7pm on January 1st. Human beings were not built to think too far into the future. Couple that with laziness, inactivity, apathy, lethargy, traffic, lack of money, and time spent showering, and there’s really no reason to not just wing everything. Unless you’ve just been elected president, you have no idea what you will be doing three years from now. Three years ago, I was fat. That’s about it. I was fat. Now I’m not. I did not see that coming.

Plans ruin everything. I’m not saying that it’s a bad thing to work towards a goal. It’s great to be motivated and to use that motivation to achieve great things. However, if you have a set objective, you may achieve it in some form, but it will never be exactly how you envisioned. For example, if you decide to lose 50 pounds within the next three years, you may get there, but it might be because you will have eventually gone broke because you lost your job and are now only able to afford ice water and taco shells.

Since I’m writing this while thinking it out without a real plan, I have now decided that plans are good, but concrete plans are not. I know I plan on going to bed tonight at around 11pm, but whether I will do this by climbing into my bed or by somersaulting, wearing only my bath towel and one sock is yet to be determined. Having no plans will lead to self-destruction while having absolute plans will lead to disappointment.