You’ll resolve to make peace with your annoying neighbor. You’ll promise to avoid carbs for the year, which really lasts about two days. You’ll resolve to see your old best friend from college more. You might even decide to make your online dating profile sparkle – finally.
But what resolutions have you made for your sex life? Have you considered what the previous year was like for you sexually? Have you considered what you want your sex life to be like in the New Year?
Yes, it matters. Sure, sex isn’t everything, but it’s a whole lot of something. Here are some solid sexual resolutions you should consider making this year. Your mind, heart and soul will thank you.
1. Enough Of The Self-Consciousness
It’s not sexy sleeping with someone who clearly isn’t comfortable in his or her own skin. It takes a lot of the sex appeal away. Your displeasure with your own body is really a huge turn-off to partners both long-term and short-term alike.
If you really feel uncomfortable in your own skin, it’s time to run (not walk) to a therapist or the gym – or both. If you really, truly can’t stand how you look, decide if it’s in your mind or if it’s a reality that you’re not in healthy shape. Once you determine the answer, do something about it.
2. Stop Closing Off Ideas
In your mind, you’ve probably got a list of things you have decided you like or don’t like sexually.
Why is this? Have you tried everything on the “no” list? Could it hurt you to try something different this year? Sometimes we are surprised by what turns us on, so why not decide to try three new things this year? You might find something new you really enjoy.
3. Pick Better
Some people need to choose better partners. When you’re not picky when it comes to sex partners, you can easily end up hurt. This year, resolve to pick better. Resolve to find people who make you feel good before, during and after sex.
If the partners you chose last year didn’t make you feel great, consider first why they made you feel bad. Consider why you still engaged with them sexually despite this fact. Determine the causes of these interactions and resolve not to repeat them in the New Year.
4. Review Your Frequency
Did you have sex as much as you wanted to last year? Why or why not?
If you didn’t have sex as much as you liked, was it due to your own lack of effort or your partner’s? Or maybe you didn’t have the opportunity to have sex as often as you had hoped.
Often, people start dating, get comfortable and forget to prioritize their sex life. Don’t let that be you! Decide you’re going to make more of an effort.
5. Debate Your Own Efforts
Are you showing up to the bedroom in a dirty sports jersey or the same old yoga pants each time? Are you and your partner doing the same thing each time? If you’re single, do you find you never switch it up with your bedroom partners?
Evaluate what you bring to the bedroom as a partner. Are you greedy? Are you a lazy lover, lying there like a starfish? Are you too quiet and afraid to say what you want?
Consider what you could do differently (and perhaps, better) in bed.
6. Own It
Forget about feeling ashamed of your sexuality. Own who you are and embrace it. We are all past high school here. Stop worrying about what other people think about you sexually, and seek out someone whose turn-ons match yours.
Just be yourself. The more you fight it, the more unhappiness you’ll have.
7. Leave A Bad Relationship
Are you in a loveless relationship and tired of a lackluster or nonexistent sex life? What is keeping you tied down to your current situation? What do you have to gain from simmering in that kind of unhappiness?
Use the New Year as an opportunity to make a fresh start. Step away from a relationship that’s not working so you can find happiness elsewhere.
These tips offer some helpful ways to improve your satisfaction both in the bedroom and in your relationships. Which sex resolutions will you make this year?
You may also be interested in 6 Ways For Singles To Break A Dating Slump