Every relationship requires compromise and a certain amount of sacrifice, however, if you’re constantly sacrificing who you are and what you want, or are giving up certain things that are truly important to you, it’s a bad sign.
A good relationship will never require you to sacrifice that much, nor would a solid partner ask you to sacrifice certain parts of yourself, especially the vital things that make you “you.”
If you find yourself making any of the following sacrifices for a relationship, it’s time to rethink whether this is the right match for you.
1. Your Religious Beliefs
How you feel about G-d and do or don’t practice your faith is not something that you should sacrifice for a relationship. Meeting a partner who either feels the same way as you do or respects how you feel is crucial. You do not want to sacrifice this just to be with someone. It will cause you issues later on down the line.
2. Your Personality
We have all known that one person who seems to change with every relationship they get into for the other person. Don’t let that be you. Sure, a new partner can introduce you to new interests and hobbies, but if you can’t be yourself with this person, then it’s doomed from the start.
3. Your Family Dream
This is a big deal-breaker. If you want a family and your partner doesn’t, or vice versa, this is not a happy union. Don’t sacrifice your vision of what family should or shouldn’t look like as it will only be a matter of time before you two break it off.
4. Your Sexuality
If a partner asks you to do things you’re not comfortable with, you need to find a more suitable partner. The same would apply if you are a very sexual person and find that your partner is not. If you see it early on in the relationship, bring it out in the open so you can talk it through. But if you each just have different expectations and desires regarding your sex lives, it’s really better to find a stronger match than try to struggle through this.
5. Your Relationships With Loved Ones
If a partner tries to get you to sever ties with your loved ones, you need to get out, like yesterday! If your boyfriend or girlfriend tries to control how often you see, talk to or hear from people you love, walk away. This is a huge no-no and a sign of a controlling partner.
6. Your Big Life Goals
Do you see graduate school, a high-powered career, early retirement or service work in your future? Perhaps your significant other is hoping to move back to their small town while you want to stay in a big city. Consider your big life goals and how your partner’s life vision complements or contrasts with them. It is good to compromise for a partnership in some ways, but you don’t want to throw out all of your big dreams simply to have someone. You would end up resenting them for it in the long run.
7. Your Values
If anyone, and I mean anyone, asks you to sacrifice your values, this is a bad relationship – period. Don’t be with someone who makes you compromise who you fundamentally are. You will only end up with deep regret and heartache.
The right relationship requires some compromise and sacrifice, but a partner in a healthy relationship won’t want you to compromise who you are at the heart of things. In addition, a good match will share a similar life vision as you do. Finding someone who complements your personality and life passions isn’t always easy, but it is worth the wait. Don’t settle!
You may also be interested in Relationship Must-Haves: Adjusting Expectations Without Settling For Less