When you’re on a first date, really try not to over-do it. Don’t arrive overly done up, you know: loads of eyeshadow and hairspray, too much cologne, etc. Don’t over indulge: don’t shovel food into your mouth or drink too much alcohol. Don’t over share: the only thing worse than a boring date is a date who appalls you with their stories. No, I don’t find your scent, your drunkenness or your pathetic story about your ex cheating on you for three years attractive. I know you’re trying to impress me and maybe you’re nervous, but slow your roll.

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