Wouldn’t it be comforting if in-person chatting on that all-important first date provided the safety nets and assurances of texting and online chatting? Namely emoticons. If I tell you a little about myself, and you say it’s interesting, how am I to know you really meant it, unless you utter it with conviction? Here’s how: If, after you say it, you tilt your head to the side and flash a big grin… : ) If it’s good enough for our computer screens, why not our naked eyeballs? (Hot first date. At least our eyeballs can get naked.)

Think of all the benefits. Aside from being able to scout out the other first daters at Starbucks® by virtue of their cocked heads, by date’s end, we’d have a firmer understanding of how things actually went. If one of us says, “I’ve gotta get going,” one imagines the go-getter isn’t exactly rushing home to input the event in their diary. (That’s a prehistoric blog.) But if after the remark, they turn sideways and grimace… : ( … that can only mean they’re sad about calling it a day!

We needn’t restrict person to person emoticons to first dates. Even after the relationship kicks into high gear and the couple wages its first inevitable tiff, a carefully placed head and goofy grin can take back an attack before it does irreparable damage:

“You loser, I wish I never met you!” Tilt head. Smile. Awww.