You’ve heard it before, but let me remind you: the most important relationship you’ll ever have in your lifetime is the relationship you have with yourself. And even when you start dating someone, it’s so incredibly important to maintain your independence.

You had a life before you got into this relationship with your bf/gf, and you want to continue on with your life while also making room for your significant other. You don’t want to depend on another person for everything. While you can and should trust that person and count on them to be there for you, it’s important to continue being confident in who you are and the relationship you have with yourself.

1. Enjoy Your Own Hobbies

It is, of course, important to do activities with your partner, but it’s also good to be able to do activities alone or with friends, too. I’m sure your grandma told you way back when, “Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.” It’s not that you should go into your relationship assuming it might end; instead, it’s just being realistic and knowing that the only guarantee when it comes to relationships in life is that you’ll always be in the one you have with yourself.

2. Make Time For Yourself

It can be easy to drop everything and only think about your bf/gf; I’ve been guilty of it, too! It’s gradual at first, but then suddenly you realize you’re only doing things with them and thinking of them before you think of yourself. Try your hardest to be independent. Don’t lose yourself. Do things for yourself! Take some days apart! Don’t spend every night together! Leave some room for mystery.

3. Don’t Neglect Your Friends

When you’re in the beginning of a relationship (the so-called “honeymoon phase”), you want to spend every waking minute together. While this isn’t the end of the world (and certainly, at the time, it sounds like the best idea ever), it would be wise to not spend every second together. Don’t neglect your friends. Make sure you have ample “me time.” This will not only benefit your relationship, but will be good for you as a person, too.

4. Check In With Yourself

Throughout your relationship, it’s not a bad idea to check in with yourself. I’m not saying to do this daily or even weekly, but every so often, touch base with yourself to see how things are going. Make sure you’re feeling happy and in a good place. Ask yourself when the last time was that you spent time alone and did your own thing. Have you seen your friends recently? No? Well, that’s a problem. Have you spent every single night with your bf/gf for the past month? That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but maybe take a night off, go have a friends night out or spend a night solo. Think about yourself.

The bottom line is that while you should absolutely give your relationship your all, do not neglect the relationship you have with yourself – ever.

You may also be interested in The Chameleon Dater: Losing Yourself In A Relationshipv