Dear Tamar,

So far, my profile has been visited by more than 50 girls, and I wrote emails to many of them but only two answered.  Is there something I’m not doing correctly? Maybe I’m not writing the correct text? I don’t like the standard, prewritten emails.  Could I get some advice?


Dear No Answers,

JDate can be a numbers game… how many women’s profiles are you viewing, sending a Flirt to, clicking on Secret Admirer or adding to your Favorites list? Do you log on daily to view women and make sure the women know you’re interested by viewing them multiple times a week? Do you write emails when you find someone you’re interested in or do you wait for them to view you in return? In order to increase your odds in getting responses to your messages you need to be active and proactive. But make sure your emails aren’t too aggressive, you don’t want to come off as desperate or needy. Tell the women why you are interested in them and what you have in common and that you hope to hear from them soon. Good luck!

One Comment
  1. If I may add some follow-up on this as well, if you’re reading this No Answers, I would highly recommend Charlie Valentino’s book Online Dating for Men (available on Amazon Kindle format for 2 bucks), and also just let you know 2 emails isn’t so bad, assuming you didn’t email all 50 of those girls.

    The best male daters on most online dating sites get about 20% of their emails returned, it’s just so easy for women’s inboxes to get flooded, and that’s something you have to know going in. But keep up the effort, there is definitely a lot of opportunity out there!


    PS. Not to overrule anything you said Tamar, just wanted to chime in as I was browsing the blog, love your work!

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