Sometimes in your relationship you will feel like something is off, and sometimes it has nothing to do with you or your relationship; it can simply be that your significant other is going through a rough patch on his or her own. It can be challenging to figure out what to do and what to say in order to help them through this rough patch. You want to offer support, but you’re not sure how.

Use these tips to make sure your SO gets through a tough time without it having a negative impact on your relationship.

Dos and Don’ts

  • Don’t play the victim. Remember that you’re not the victim here. Whatever they are going through likely has nothing to do with you. So, once you find out what it is they are experiencing that’s causing tension, you need to trust that.
  • Be supportive. Listen and be there for them if and when they want to talk to you about the issue at hand.
  • Don’t ask them over and over if they are okay. That will bother them more than anything else, and you’ll be adding to the stress they are currently dealing with. Checking in with them is good to do, but checking in with them every 30 minutes is not recommended.
  • Try to take their mind off things. Plan a fun distraction, but know that they might not be in the mood to have their mind taken off said things. If you can tell they’re just not in the mood to be silly and goofy, for example, then don’t push it. It’ll just make them more stressed.

What To Say And Not Say


  • “How are you doing today? I’m here if you want to talk.”
  • “Things will get better, but I know it’s rough right now. Just know I’m here for you.”

Don’t say:

  • “Can you snap out of it already?”
  • “Your mood is really starting to bother me.”

Those are just a couple examples of what is good to say and not say when your significant other is going through a rough patch. Bottom line: you want to help alleviate the stress, not add to it.

If It’s You

Now, if the reason for your significant other’s stress is you and that’s why he or she has been “off,” it needs to be discussed. As we all know, communication is everything, and even if he or she is scared to tell you that you’re contributing to the rough time, you need to be receptive to it. It might be a tough pill to swallow, but until it’s out there, nothing good can come about.

So, next time your significant other is going through a difficult time, be sensitive and respectful to them and their needs, and have patience. All will be well in time, and that’s what you have to remember, too. And if you’re the one going through a rough patch, share this article with them!

You may also be interested in 4 Ways To Build Intimacy In Relationships

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