Whether you’re on a dating website or looking to be set up through a mutual friend, many of us have a “type.” Basically, it’s a list of must-haves we want in our next significant other that leads us to date a select variety of individuals. From the physical (tall, dark hair, strong build) to the mental and emotional (can have deep conversations, good family values), it can be a rather lengthy list of desired characteristics. Now, while it’s good to know on some level what you like and don’t like, it’s not necessarily a good thing to have a type. Here’s why.
If you have a type, you are making it known (whether just in your head to yourself or to others) that you want a person with x, y and z. The problem is that if a seemingly great person comes along that is missing one or more of those traits, you might immediately write them off. But what if they end up being an incredible match who you click with in a big way? Not having a type allows you to be more open to many more suitors and many more chances at love.
What if it turns out that you end up realizing you want a specific characteristic in a person that you didn’t initially know about? If you limit yourself to only dating your “type,” then you might not realize what else you like. Because you’ve put it in your head that you only like certain things, you might not discover those other traits that suit you well.
Who They Know
While on a date with someone who isn’t your type, they might not feel the connection either, but maybe they know someone else who would be a better fit for you. Maybe you’ll become good friends with this person if it doesn’t work out romantically. It’s best to not close yourself off to the possibilities.
It’s very possible that you think you know your type, but you actually don’t. Self-discovery is a lifelong process, so who you think is your type at one point in your life might be something very different later on. It’s best to keep those options open and allow yourself the chance to have multiple “types” throughout the course of your single life. Just as you’re always changing and growing, so might be your ideal partner.
So, the next time someone wants to set you up or you’re looking for eligible suitors online, keep an open mind. Don’t think that just because this person isn’t matching your type to a T that they won’t necessarily be a good person for you. You might be surprised at what you find, and you have nothing to lose. If you don’t end up clicking with the person, then so be it, but you’ll never know if you don’t give them a shot.
Do you have a type? Are you open to someone who isn’t necessarily your type? What do you think on the topic? I would love to hear in the comments below.
You may also be interested in Why Didn’t It Work: When Your Date Looks Good On Paper, But Sparks Don’t Fly